Signals
Many factors can wreak havoc on one's confidence. An encounter with a self checkout machine at Walmart, for instance.... Mary and I found ourselves in High Point, NC, with some extra time on our hands, so we stopped and shopped at a Walmart that our phone sent us to on our way to check out the new giant troll someone built out of wood in an industrial section of High Point.
I got some eye drops and Mary got some apples, ketchup, etc. on the opposite side of the big store. We met at aisle 1, where we spotted an "available" self checkout spot. We did our usual routine with speed and efficiency. She handed me an item. I scanned it ("Beep") and bagged it. What great teamwork, I thought, as I scanned the last item. Then we looked at the screen: "This machine is unavailable. Please use another one." Mary noticed a light on a pole above the machine was red. I wondered why we were allowed to scan everything.
We placed the last bag into the cart and off we went, back out of the aisle to the next one where an available slot beckoned us, past an attendant with his smart blue apron and badge who eyed us with raised eyebrows and a little twist of head.
"The machine was unavailable," Mary said.
"CuriosityPants" leaned over a railing between aisle 1 and 2 to check the screen we had used.
"Did you not read the screen?" he asked.
"I want to know why it let us scan our items," I quipped, thinking his remark was rather rude.
"Well, it didn't did it?" he said.
"Dickhead," I muttered as we passed him on the way out. He smiled.
He's not going to get employee of the month, Mary and I thought.
It took me a while to disengage from that incident. It wreaked havoc on my frame of mind. I really let it get to me.
Getting recognized as an older person is bothering me these days. I resent the young man opening the door at the gym for me. I don't need that. I resent people losing their patience with me as I struggle for a thought, or the right word, or to understand what someone said because I didn't catch everything they said.
The guy speeding around my car beeping his horn because I didn't speed up quick enough when the speed limit changed from 45 to 55....
As Mary and I drove home, we thought about stopping in Asheboro for lunch. We were on US 73/74. We came to an exit for Presnell Road. The exit for Presnell shares the same lane as the entrance for Vision Drive just prior to Presnell, they are so close to one another.
"Let's go to Burrito Brothers," I said, looking at Mary.
"Okay," she said, as I veered into the exit/entrance lane where a monstrous diesel truck - inches from the side of the car - roared past us at "80 miles an hour" and I jerked back into my lane.
